If you ask James to quote the title of this post, he'll do it in a passable Nigel Tufnel accent. In fact his general ability to do accents is rather good, cue – g'day mate.
It's been a year for all of us. In spite of the difficulties he has remained the most amazing young man. He may be 11 but he still has the enthusiasm of a little boy. I've mentioned this before but he is fiercely passionate about stuff that he's deeply passionate about. At the moment it's history, specifically the second world war. This is great because I'm interested in that stuff, in fact I can see that we will be spending a lot of time at the War Museum this December.
This is pretty much 2022 done for James, it was the first normal year he'd had in three years. School had gone back to normal, he was able to freely mingle with his friends and he was forced to play sport. Hmmm not the best friends are James and sport. His school insists you play all sports, and there were glimpses of enjoyment, but not much. If he is to choose a sport then it will be swimming. And he's started water polo lessons. That's good news.
Our domestic situation has changed and I'm fortunate enough to see my kids in the day. I don't see them at night and haven't found a place where each kid has their own room. But there have been enthusiastic sleepovers in the lodgings. Him on a camp bed at the foot of my bed, but not for long. Still there's that enthusiasm, he does see a lot positivity in what's going around him. I draw a lot of inspiration from this.
For some reason I am suffering from chronic writer's block at the moment. I'll end it here. JimJam you are my hero. Your inner strength is contagious. You are still a very popular kid who makes friend very easily. And also you slot in so naturally with friends that you haven't seen for years. You are also a bright kid with an incredible thirst for knowledge. I love you very much and I know your brother does too even though he hides it so well.
As I write this, James has one more day as a young man in a single digit. From tomorrow he is going to be in double digits. It's a significant development in anyone's life. And my youngest son has reached it.
COVID has had a huge impact on all school kids, James is no exception. He can be very grateful that the school he attends now has a firm grip in the online schooling environment. In fact parental involvement was actively discouraged during that period. What I found most interesting was how the kids had started developing an online relationship that almost replaced the physical that is so vital to kids of that age. They would play games like Roblox and Blox and sox and Fonzie and whatever else for hours. That virtual companionship remains where James will be called at dinner time to go and play with his mates. This is somewhat concerning in the world that we all grew up in, but might not be for the kids of James' generation. In spite of this he got back to school and rekindled his face to face relationships and remains an incredibly popular kid. He had his birthday party this last weekend (which doubled as a piss-up for his parents' friends, as these parties do) and they had a wild time running around in a forest.
This is the world as we know it. COVID has changed everything for everyone. For most South African school kids it has become an unfortunate stumbling block. We haven't seen the negative effects in James and I'm hoping that we don't. The school has re-introduced sport and James is playing all the sports and deciding which one he likes – hockey is out thus far. He's a good swimmer and is showing great potential as a cricketer. He's not phased about which team he plays for. He plays because he's with his mates. He also doesn't mind calling the shots from the goal mouth as a soccer goalie.
We are at last allowed to go onto the school to watch the games. There certainly was a practice where parents would watch from the fence. You can't keep parents away from these things. The best times of my life have been watching my children playing sport. I didn't to watch Oliver play a single match this year but I did catch a few of James' games. I feel for the coaches because there is very little discipline in the field. I think they would have done their jobs if the ball leaves a child's hand. James has got that part right and could become a really decent fast bowler.
James has grown substantially. He reads voraciously. Hasn't quite substituted a kindle for a TV game yet, but hopefully the kindle time will increase. In spite of this physical and emotional growth, he's still a child at heart who lives within his very vivid and colourful imagination. He loves dinosaurs and will tell anyone who cares to listen about them. He loves his games and he loves his friends. He rightfully calls himself the best artist and architect in the house. This creativity has now extended to animation.
I would be remiss if I didn't mention his under-the-breath speech that is demonstrated when he is being chastised (which is often). He's a master of that technique, perhaps he doesn't want us to hear the very colourful language that is often inaudible. I can't be sure where he learned all that. It's all part of the child that we love and cherish. He's not the best morning person. But that passes quickly. He loves the motorbike and relishes every opportunity to go to school on the bike. I think he likes to show off in front of his mates who think he's very cool.
Happy double figures my wonderful youngest son. It's grade four next year with a number of new challenges. The school days will be longer and the work a little harder but your foundation is good and you are very loved by everyone in this house, and that includes your older brother. You have your friends and a large number of kids who all regard you as a close friend. You've got that knack of making friends easily. Children around you want to be your friend. And we are so glad you are our son.
James Phillips remains a South African musical icon. They should make his music part of the history syllabus in every school in the country. I could make my James the Phillips ambassador.
Today James has spent 256 days in a COVID world. Roughly half of the 366 days in this year have been spent in lockdown. It's not a year that many of us will forget. However what this year has given us is an insight into how James works when he is not at school. The lockdown story is quite amusing.
When it started in March, his mother decided that we would honour the school timetable and start school at 7:30. This went down like a lead balloon. There was extreme resistance from all in the house. For James it was probably a bit too much. To have school start at that hour and there is no playing with your friends was not on. On top of this, having all the people in the house monitor his every move didn't suit him either. The school was caught like a deer in the headlights and would send us work that needed to be done and no idea as to how we were going to deliver it. In effect his parents and Thuli became his teachers. This was interesting.
Needless to say we all settled into it. I had a lot of fun trying to make his lessons interesting. We would go on safaris around the property to look for symmetrical things. We would write stories together that he would read to us. When school went back, it was every second day, James would come up to my office to do his work. We got a lot done using a focus keeper. I swear by this thing. It ticks away for 25 minutes and then gives you a break. I would sit up here with him listening to his perpetual whistle (that one day will be recorded as a dissonant symphony) whilst he banged away on a computer.
I may have mentioned this in Oliver's missive last month, but we would go out at 7 to clap for the health workers. This led to an exchange of booze with our neighbours and then went as far as all of us having a drink and a chat for half an hour at seven. James came out on his bicycle and would ride up and down the road. UNTIL ONE DAY!!!! When the cops came to arrest those who were outside, they arrived at 19:02, that evening. We didn't go out that night but there was a ruckus with our local plastic surgeon telling the cops to go back to the station and sanitise their van and then bring each person up individually. This does highlight how ludicrous this COVID operation has been. I look back on it now and it's almost unbelievable.
The lockdown did present a number of opportunities for James. He and I made a rope ladder to the roof (not to the moon – although James would be very interested in that). We then created an assault course around the house that James revelled in. But James missed his friends. As the lockdown started heading into the ridiculous so we arranged playdates. James was so happy. He is an extremely popular child who lives for his friends. He has the most incredible ability to make friends. Whilst on holiday in February he and I walked to the swimming pool at the resort. He found two kids playing there. I think the one kid asked James what his name was, upon learning that the kid's name was Blake, James and Blake were inseparable. They did everything together. And that's a feature of James' life. He just gets on with people. He draws them into his vivid imagination and they play games that have a lot of "let's says" in them. These let says happen every two minutes, id est "Let's say we were living on an island with carnoraptors and they want to eat our food and we have blastoLMGs and shoot them and hide up a tree." The next let's say would be "let's say that I am the guy who doesn't have a gun but I make one out of a pterodactyl's beak."
All of this highlights the amazing imagination James has. It's active and needs to express itself all the time. He's full of Nerf gun lore, and must tell (mostly his mother) the new developments all the time. Whilst he loves online stuff like Minecraft, he can still entertain himself for hours building Lego. And when the Lego starts then James pretty much takes over the house, there are Lego pieces everywhere. He has control over a number of rooms and is not know for his tidy up skills. You'll hear a "JAMESSSS!" screamed across the house reminding him to close cupboards, pick up towels, tidy up after himself etc.
It's also been a year where, in spite of the lockdown, that James has started to play a little sport. There is an eagerness, he is not yet as passionate as his older brother, but he is taking part in a few activities. We made use of a personal trainer for a few weeks and James went to every session got stuck in. On top of this he has grown out of his bicycle – he's co-opted his brother's bike.
It's been a year JimJam (or HamJam, Jamfertz or any other nickname that might be used) but you've done well. I think we've all got to know each other very well. You are still passionate and enthusiastic, even with your violin. It's these characteristics that draw people to you. It was a big deal when your friend Fred ended up in hospital and requested to speak to you on the phone. You have this magnetism and empathy and love for your friends. Everyone can see this.
You're nine now. You are growing up so quickly but the little boy in you is still there. Some of the temper tantrum skills you picked up when you are younger still exist, like the swearing under your breath (I want to know who taught him that). These make you, and it's the you that your family and friends love and adore. Happy birthday my perfect youngest son.
And the DJ wants his turn, thank goodness that I control the music on this blog. I could never post the music that my two sons listen to, although James' tastes are far more palatable than Oliver's.
James Phillips
Rather like Frank Zappa, who America really needs right now, South Africa desperately people like Lucky Dube and James Phillips. The song I have chosen is called Shotdown. It's about bodies in the streets shot by the apartheid security forces. It seems that they taught our current people how not to go about a lockdown. There are a number of people who were senselessly murdered during the lockdown - Collins Khoza being the most notable. Phillips would have been devastated to see the country that he sacrificed so much for return to the same oppression as it did during his tenure as an outspoken anti-apartheid activist.
Better known in Australia, Reyne fronted the incredible Australian Crawl. They were around in the early 80s and left us with a few albums. Oz Crawl were a fantastic band, great singers, better songs and fantastic musicianship. If this song about business travel doesn't get you off your feet then you need get out and socially distance a bit more.
Blink and you discover that your little boy has been on this planet for eight years. How on earth did that happen, it was perhaps yesterday that I was walking him to nursery school – that yesterday was two years ago. Our little boy has been in big school for two years and finishing off his grade one year. Grade one requires a school uniform and school shoes and writing and reading and all that stuff. And he is doing all that stuff.
It was an interesting process dressing him up in his school uniform and getting him to school at 7:30, vs the 8 o clock start that he had for his first four years at school (I do need to stress that this is done mostly by his mother and Thuli). It's not been too much of stretch because his brother has to be at school at a similar time. It's now school bags and bubble bags, readers and languages.
There is a loyalty to his friends that sets James apart from others. His big mates are Arno, Max and Fred, they were all in the same class last year but now have been moved into separate classes. This has not prevented James from meeting them on the playground most days and playing with them. They are his core group of friends and they have regular sleepovers at his house (chaos) and he often goes to their houses for sleepovers (other peoples' chaos).
Our youngest has adapted well to school life. He has no issues wearing the uniform and respects his teachers. A very rule bound boy, James probably enjoys the structure and the discipline that schools tend to insist upon. It's early in his school career, there is no structured sport other than athletics and swimming. Athletics hasn't quite captured his imagination but swimming has and with a gala coming up in the next week, I expect to see a competitive boy in the pool. He won't be coming into sport as a novice when it formally starts in the next year or so, he has received intense and expert coaching from his football-mad older brother. If you want to play with your older brother then you had better play soccer and so James plays soccer and there is a steady improvement in his game, he's enjoying it too.
James is the creative one in our house, there are LEGO sculptures and paper animals everywhere. There is enough LEGO to build a mansion in the Karoo. I haven't suggested this to James because he might actually build it. His reading is good enough now to consult architecture manuals for the build. It's been wonderful watching him learn to read, everything that can be read is read, he read's road signs, notice boards – anything with words on it. We're still reading him a chapter out of any of the Walliams books every night, but I expect that he will become more self sufficient in the next few months and take himself off to bed with a book. He's also quite proficient with languages, he listens to what he learns at school and what he picks up at home and is happy to throw in the occasional sentence.
James is still our little boy. He's a sensitive child who is still susceptible to monsters after watching shows on TV. He's still the worst bedmate I have ever come across, which results in one of us leaving the bed (which is as big as Texas) when he runs through to join us. He's a little brother that needs to find his space with a sport obsessed older brother. And because he hasn't started formal sport yet he finds himself dragged to watch his older brother on multiple sports fields. He was spared from watching his brother performing at his Suarez (soiree) though. He has found his own interests. He's taken up the violin, mostly because his best mates are also playing the instrument. He's stuck at it and has performed at his first concert, which he delivered with aplomb. He should practice more but he's young and still finding what works and doesn't work for him, I expect he'll go through a multitude of instruments before the end of primary school.
Happy eighth birthday JimJam. These have been very rewarding years for me, I revel in your enthusiasm and wild theories and stories that might be slightly (if not completely) devoid of truth, told with a deadpan face. I love how you are actually able to entertain yourself. I love your artwork, I love your imagination and I love you forever. You are the finest youngest son any parent could wish for. Next year is grade 2 and more adventures.
The picture is one of James' artworks. It's a llama, not a drama llama like his brother was in his school play.
James' designated musician is James Phillips, who just becomes more relevant as the new government reverts back to the methods that their oppressors taught them. This track is taken off the "Wie is Bernoldus Niemand" album. I probably have said this before and will say for the rest of time. This album is the most significant album ever released by a South African artist. This is not to decry the significant contributions made by artists like Johnny Clegg or National Wake. Its significance lies in the fact that it was the precursor to the Voelvry movement that played a core role in the dismantling of apartheid. When the likes of Johannes Kerkorrel and Andre Letoit (as he was known then) went on their tour of the country they dragged James Phillips along – the album was already five years old by then. It was that tour that forced the apartheid government to take notice of the once compliant Afrikaans youth who were now happily writing songs that spoke out against the apartheid system. What was more alarming to the apartheid state was the fact that the white youth were listening to this music and attending the concerts. Apartheid fell soon after that.
The track is about a young lady called Marie Ferrari who aspires to marry well and live in Waterkloof with all the trappings of wealth. She ends up falling for a skollie with a volksie. A wonderful song and a great lesson for everyone. I have put the link up there where you can buy the track, and I would encourage you to buy the whole album. But seeing that this post is supposed to be there forever, I've chosen to put up the song for download. I do want my children to listen to my dubious music for many years to come.
CAN – Mushroom. The first time I heard this song I was transfixed. This was real music to my ears. CAN belonged to a musical movement known as Krautrock. The movement arose when young German musicians were looking for an identity that they could call German. They justifiably detested Schlager (which is what Kurt Darren has modelled his insipid career on) and related to the English hardrock of the time – Purple and Sabbath were two examples. But they wanted something German so they created this. What I love the most about this track is that you have four German musicians and a Japanese singer singing in English. How on earth can this not be great. I heard James singing this song to himself and I swelled with pride. I did ask Chris Daffy of LMRadio to play it but he declined – so I'm putting it up for you poor people who thought German music was Beethoven, Mozart and Howard Carpendale.
For those who wish to know more about Krautrock, the video below is a great place to start.
James and friends. This is a common feature of James' seven years on this planet. Always friends and few of these friends are teddies. James is the only one of my children who will come upstairs to my office, wade his way through the many guitars and talk to me. He might come up to use the bathroom - or, as in this case bring up his teddies (whose names at the time were Oscar and BearBear, but were subject to change depending on the mood). You may have noticed that they are prepared for a 3d movie - but I think they look really cool.
Back to the friends. James has a number of friends, he's a very popular kid. He goes on multiple playdates and has regular sleepovers with his mate Arno. He's so comfortable at Arno's house that I don't think he'd ever come back if we didn't insist on it.
Our little boy is now at big school. It's one lift to school for us. Teachers are no longer referred to by their first names - they are now Miss, Mrs, Ms or Mr. I always judge how a child has settled in by how long it takes them to walk into school on their own. It took a term or two but he's there. In fact I think he was ready long before that - because as soon as he walks into his classroom he'll find one of his class mates to talk to and then you have to beg a goodbye kiss and hug. I suspect that he correctly recognises that his old man could benefit from a little bit of exercise.
He was so excited about going to big school that he wore his grade 0 uniform for a week before school started. This is a simple outfit - a golf shirt and hat. Next year he starts with the real uniform - and then we say goodbye to our little boy and welcome the new big boy.
Seven years have past. And my how he's grown up. He is fiercely eloquent and very able to express himself when he chooses and this is not always in English - I think he has a bit of a talent for languages. However when he chooses not to talk and you are desperately trying to extract some information out of him, it is best to give up. He'll talk by mouthing the words and withdraw into a very committed sulk.
But I think this is a character trait of an extremely creative young man. Give him a box and duct tape and you'll lose him for hours. Throw in pieces of paper and a pencil and he'll come out with a comic book. He takes pride in his ability to build and quite correctly has named himself the most creative builder and drawer in the house.
And then there are the tall tales. Always concluded with seyisslee. They range from black widows in his bed to snakes in the house. Seyisslee! But put on with the straightest face ever. Each tale is more grand than the previous. I think this is why he has such a creative streak - it's because his mind is racing. Much of the stuff comes from Minecraft and Newtube. W will most certainly have to watch his screen addiction in future.
But it's not all sitting on couches and on iPads. He's taken to sports that his brother has shown little interested in. He's doing so well in karate and I hope that he keeps it up. It's not easy and requires discipline but I think James has the ability to go through with it. He's also a great swimmer. Where this comes from I will never know. For now those are his sports. Seeyiyuss (I can't settle on a spelling of this word) school sport only happens in a few years' time.
(And now for a short commercial break - seeyisly)
Our JimJam is a beautiful child. Affectionate and loving and fiercely temperamental. He will sulk if he doesn't get his nightly story. But he is warm and giving and a joy and gives the best hugs ever (known as Dad's special surprise). He is adored by all who know him - especially his family and all the people who live with him.
Happy birthday my seven year old boy. I tried to think of a better title for this post but nothing came, we'll wait for eight for something more witty. I love you for ever and ever.
Then there's always music - James, like his brother, has no interest in my music. But it's MY blog so I'll post what I want.
It's a dancing song - might be related to an over indulgence of red wine. One of James Phillips more comical songs. He was a very seeyiss musician. And as I've said before - South Africa needs him now more than ever.
"I can't have this because it's sugarish." Is not a statement, it's a question. Strangely, such questions tend to be only asked when it comes to sugar. Never does he ask such a question when it comes to vegetables, mince, breakfast or beer. And yet he defies the odds of such a sugar addiction with a body that is devoid of any fat. I think he's uncomfortably skinny.
This is our little boy who is coming to the end of his nursery school career. And what a career it's been. We decided to keep James at the nursery school for another year because he was thriving there. He's one of the big boys in the school, next year he has to start from scratch at big school.
What about this year then. There've been a number of significant events in his life. His mouth is almost devoid of teeth (something that made him very cool amongst his peers at school), he can ride a bicycles confidently. One specific bike incident leaps to the fore. The two of us were riding around the Zoo Lake, with James weaving between trees. Unfortunately he hit my back tyre and earned himself a fairly decent roastie. It was the end of the earth. The only solution was bandages and plasters. He still had to ride back to the car - but it was a very tearful event. He has got back on his bike and we've been on a ride or two on the spruit as a family. He does not fully understand cycling protocol, like you don't stop suddenly on a single path with a number of irate cyclists behind you, he is however swiftly reminded by the myriad people behind him.
Like his older brother, James is a very enthusiastic little boy. Once he gets his mind set on something, there's no way out. And there's also no way he's going to allow you to not share in his knowledge. Questions like "Dad, who is your favourite Lego Ninjago character?" are common. For those in the know, and James is very much IN THE KNOW, there are multiple answers that you are expected to know and much disdain is poured upon you if you don't answer correctly. My standard response is "Master Wu". This response has now brought in a new level of interrogation and knowledge sharing. As it turns out, Master Wu appears in a number of Lego Ninjago sets and we are subject to grilling on these sets. It's amazing how children learn at such an early age how to sell things. Rule 4 of crass sales is get your prospect to agree with you. James doesn't give in until you agree with him. Fortunately the "Master Wu" response encompasses all questions that might be asked.
So large is Lego in his life that when his mother went on a business trip to the States the only question he was able to ask her when she spoke to him was about the Lego she was going to bring him back (oh yes, let's not forget the guitar I got - I think this brings the tally up to about 32). He was unrelenting. "Can you show me the Lego, Mom.", "How many pieces has it got, Mom". A few suggestions were made by me to inquire as to how his mother's trip was going, but he was unable to exercise restraint for very long. He did however have to wait a few months to get the rattle copter, which should have been opened by the time you read this post.
James is an independent kid, a little shy, but he gets stuck in with life and his friends. He adores his friends. We all went to his new school induction day and the headmaster called for all the new kids to go to the classrooms, we weren't sure that he'd do it. But he did and with no prompting or prodding. Then it was a thing to extract him from the school. I think he's ready for next year. I think he's a very liked kid and he'll revel in the challenge of big school. He's surprised us with his interest in cricket - and he's not a bad batsman for someone who has just picked it up and his bowling arm is not too bad either.
Here we are JimJam (as all his school mates and teachers address him), or JambleFlop or JimmieJam or any address that comes to mind at the moment. You're over half way in your first decade and you have been an absolute joy. It's hard having a much older brother because you get dragged around to watch his cultural and sporting activities but your time will come and your parents will be there cheering you on the side of the field or stage. You are perfect younger son, a wonderful younger brother and companion to your older brother and growing up at a rate that your clothes and shoes aren't able to match. You are a passionate child, a trait that will stand you in good stead in the next chapter of your life. We love you JimJam and we wait impatiently for you to start your new life at big school.
If you look at the picture you'll see Thuli, NemoShacko and James doing homework. James is wearing glasses (Spiderman glasses I stress) because he went to visuable therapy and they have taught him to wear glasses. It's a stunning pic of a stunning child and the people who have been absolutely critical in his upbringing (and NemoShacko).
I would hate to forget some of the words he uses. He still meeds to do things. He was explaining to me why petrol has such a name, it’s the petch that makes the wheels roll. He also spends a lot of his allotted screen time on NewTube - watching Lego Ninjago clips.
And there's always music. James Phillips is James’ dedicated musician. If you haven’t seen the Radio Rats documentary “Jiving and Dying” then you are absolutely missing out. I seem to be alone in my passion for them here at home, although my kids know “ZX Dan” very well. Phillips covered “Welcome to my car” on his Bernoldus Niemand album. The Rats’ version is somewhat bluesy, Phillips turned it into a lounge song. He jazzed it up and made it a lot more sordid, the bawdiness that Jonathan Handley and Dave Davies evoked is not present in James’ version. I prefer this version to the Rats original.
I have, until recently, been a bassist in the Badly Packed Parachute. My good friend Jeff has decided to lend his more considerable bass talents to this band and I am now an understudy guitarist. We were playing a band song called Johnny Cool (named after a James Phillips song) and Jeff started playing a Paul McCartney-approved bass line, the song went into another dimension. This is one of my favourite (James Paul I stress) McCartney basslines. You’d better download it quickly before it gets pulled.
It is vital that you write down what your children say before you forget it. When it comes to looking back at the last year so much has happened that if I didn't start writing this post a few months before his birthday I might have forgotten some of the things he's done.
On the way to school, James and I walk to school often, James started singing this song.
Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin lost his willy
Robin lost his willly and then he lost his willy.
The way I remember this song is like this
Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin ran away
Batmobile lost its wheel and landed in a bale of hay, hey
That's not the way it goes. Robin definitely lost his willy. But as James explained this morning (being the 9th of September 2016), Willy was Batman's dog!!! He might have been a little inspired by his friend Reggie
Recently we had a conversation about gas(oline). He saw the petrol cap lever in my car and said "that's where the gas goes.". Being the not-so-American parent that I am, I told him that was an American word. We use the word petrol. "Oh!" he says. "It's the petch that makes the wheels roll." You can't beat that.
Another year and so many milestones have been passed. Last year he'd barely dip his toes in the sea, now he's in there. Not to the same extent as his brother, who is a veritable fish, but James gets stuck in. He loves swimming, he can now swim a full length as well and will swim until he is completely blue and shivering. He has perfected the "hammerheadsault" which is a somersault but called a hammerheadsault. Let's not forget the language. I am perpetually surprised by his vocabulary and his diction. He still meeds to do things but otherwise his grasp of the English language is substantial and continues to impress me daily. Whereas Oliver is an academic-like child with a voracious appetite for books, James is an artistic child. He creates sculptures (his definition) out of cable ties and string and gaffer tape and wood and paper and anything he get his hands on.
Where would James be without wifire. He's now learned to reboot the router when it chooses not to work. I remember one of the first words he learned to say was "buffering". Such is the digital age. Their digital addiction is so extreme that they have been limited to 30 minutes a day (longer on weekends) in front of TV or the equivalent. A standard request is to watch NyooTube. He watches lots of Lego videos on dinosaurs. He loves dinosaurs and is an expert on a wide variety of these strange creatures. We will go to the library and he'll desperately look for dinosaur books - unfortunately dinosaur books are very popular at the Rosebank library so we have to stock up on NyooTube.
And then there is sugar. "Is this sugarish?. I can't have sugar, hey?" James approaches things that he's not allowed to do by asking his parents and Thuli whether he can't do something. "I can't watch TV, hey?". No James, you can't, you've had your sugar and TV fix. He persists though.
James is very much a glass half-full child who gets excited by so many things. Every present he gets is greeted with a "I've always wanted this". He is loving and affectionate and can have the most intense conversations about some over-the-top topic with such earnestness that you can't help but laugh. Laughing is the wrong thing to do under these circumstances. Often you'll see two parents stifling laughter whilst a complicated topic is being elucidated.
This is his second last year at nursery school. He'll do another year before big school. He loves his school and adores his friends. There is a strange relationship with TJ, he was adamant that he didn't want to play with him and it seemed to be mutual, but they are great friends and spend a lot of time at school and after school together. Sadly TJ moves on at the end of this year, in fact a number of his friends at school will move out to big school. James will be fine, it's me I'm worried about. Over the last couple of years I have developed kiddie-party relationships with a number of parents and I'm going to have to start from scratch next year.
Happy birthday my precious youngest son. You and your brother light up our lives. I look forward to having you come up to my office after school and talking to me and telling me about your day and showing me things you've made at school. I love walking to school with you even though you tell me religiously that you don't want to walk to school. I love the stories you tell me on the way to school. Your absolute confidence in your knowledge when you are so patently wrong but won't listen to contrary opinions. I love how you shout Dad, Dad, Dad, DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD when you realise that you aren't going to get what you want. I love that you come into the bedroom almost every night and take over the bed (I've got to know James' bed quite well). I love reading you stories.
All our love for the next year JimJam, you'll be one of the oldest kids in the school and will soar. Your family loves you very much and can't wait to see you as a five year old.
There's been a resurgence of interest in James Phillips. The recent Radio Rats documentary "Jiving and Dying" features James rather extensively. There is so much to James that I have yet to hear. I bump into a number of people who knew at varsity and in the clubs and he was a hard living character. At the Jiving and Dying premiere they announced the James' mother was in the audience. I was a little overawed.
Most people associate "I'm so Glad" with Cream who covered it on the "Fresh Cream" album. The original version was recorded almost 40 years before Cream covered it. The story goes that Clapton, Bruce and Baker went out of their way to make sure that royalties for this recording were given to Skip James. James used the money to fight the cancer that eventually killed him (contrast this to Led Zeppelin). I think this is the definitive version, Cream sanitised it.
Most parents who have more than one child will tell you how different their children are. Thank goodness mine are no exception if they were I would just rehash Oliver's 4th birthday post.
The two children are remarkably different. A fact I will be reiterate until I stop writing these missives. Oliver has a vivid and active imagination. James is more literal and of this world. He is more independent than Oliver, but is certainly quite influenced by him. Yesterday we were at Reggie's party and James came up to me and said "How come (X) gets to have cake?!". Words directly from his brother's mouth. James has entered nursery school, the same nursery school that Oliver went to. As with Oliver I get to walk James to school in the morning. I've found that we get to school 40 minutes earlier if I carry him on my shoulders (the school is 800 metres away). We tried riding to school on his JDBug a few times but that takes an incredible amount of time. I would inevitably put him on my shoulders and carry him and everything else to school. There are no stories told on the way, that's not his thing. We'd sometimes talk about the weather, who he was going to play with, his friends at school and he has a number of those. James settled into school very quickly, he stopped crying after the second day and just got stuck in. The teachers also call him JimJam which makes my heart soar. I think to a large extent he's rather like his mother. His behaviour at times borders on reckless, he's not a cautious boy like his brother. Now I'm not saying his mother is reckless but when we went skiing a long time ago if Kath could see the bottom of the slope she would gun it down that hill. James is similar, he and his JD Bug will fly down any hill and damn the consequences – and there have been consequences.
Then there is the language. It could be that school has increased his vocabulary but whatever the reason is his language and comprehension has improved a million-fold in the last year. Here are a smattering of statements that I wrote down over the last few months.
Long sleeve shorts
I don't have enough toys (we are reminded of this situation ALL the time – he does have enough toys)
I meed more toys (of course he meeds more toys)
NemoShacko (more accurately MemoShacko). More on NemoShacko below
Does this have sugar in it? Sugar isn't healthy (wise beyond your years my boy)
My leg is sore I can't walk (this is what I get when I take him off my shoulders and get him to walk the last 50 metres into school. He can really ham it up. I've taken to doing the same with the opposite leg and we walk into school as the hopalongs)
That's the deal (that's what he says to you when the deal is in his favour)
Carious George (Curious George)
And then there's using language to justify why you shouldn't
Eat your supper
Bath
Go to bed
Eat breakfast
Go to school
Do anything
Stop playing
Get out of the pool (we don't have one of those at the moment – four of us are sleeping in the same bedroom)
It would be remiss to omit his tantrums (or is that tantra?). Mein Gott this kid is a pro. The naughty corner is perilously close to losing its primary function as a guest toilet. The terrible twos have now seamlessly merged with the fucking fours. No respite, no quarter given. Food tantrums involve declining to eat anything other than refined carbohydrates (even though sugar is bad for you –see above).
And then there is NemoShacko. Who calls their cat NemoShacko!! We had a deal that because Oliver named Leia (he was very into Starwars at the time) James could name the kitten. We went off to the vet to collect the kitten and waited a while. Oliver cottoned on that we were collecting a cat and so we said we're coming to get a fish like Nemo. When the cat came out we said to James, "what's the kitty's name" – "NemoShacko". I think this is the best name for a pet ever!!!! There are variances, NemoShacko Jack, NemoShacko Black Cat, Snowy (you'll see from the picture that NemoShacko is neither black nor snowy.
He is capable of amusing himself, although he begs his parents to play with him. But you put him in swimming pool he will swim for hours. I took both of them to the Parkhurst pool and James got into his armbands and swam all over the pool. Sometimes this independence can lead to a lost child and we've been known to do this on occasion - hence the title of this post.
Happy fourth birthday JimJam. You are the best youngest son a parent could ever wish for. You are adored by your older brother and you adore him in return (this might not always be apparent). We love you very much and are immensely proud of you. You've had a fantastic year at school, made a lot of friends and grown up to be the person who your parents and family love more and more each day.
Last year I went off to the Shifty 30th year anniversary concert and spent a day listening to the music that was so important to my own musical journey. It was bands like the Gereformeerde Blues Band that made me appreciate and love Afrikaans as a language (this is after two years of military Afrikaans which can put you off the language completely). James Phillips started this alternatiewe Afrikaans movement with his "Wie is Bernoldus Niemand?". Phillips is James' dedicated musician, he was a very politically active and conscious musician who died just as South Africa moved into a democracy. What is frightening though is how a number of his songs written about the apartheid government now ring true for the Zoomer dictatorship.
I was talking to a parent at Reggie's party yesterday about the best guitarists ever. He showed me a post where Hendrix wasn't even mentioned. This is very rare. Most polls start with Hendrix and then move five other names around to make the top six. Hendrix came into my life in the early eighties via a book called "The Natural Superiority of the left hander". Hendrix and McCartney were the reasons why I never learned to play the guitar right handed, even though I am very naturally left (something I do rather regret). Red House is now a blues standard. It's like Dust My Broom or Crossroads or Sweet Home Chicago. As a guitarist you want to learn this song. There are numerous live recordings but this is the best. Yes it's long but it never gets boring and it showcases what a great blues guitarist was.
Happy birthday my wonderful and fantastic and beloved JimJam. Many more happy returns.
And were the terrible twos spectacular or what? Perhaps a little more intense than his older brother's. But what a child. A wicked laugh, a true goer, someone who finds his toddlerhood a little limiting - he wants to play like his brother.
What I find most surprising is how two children from the same parents can be so diametrically different. James is less compliant than his brother and twenty times more headstrong (when he is right, he is RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!). This is the year where his personality has really come to the fore. It's built around his home environment, his first year at play school (which he settled into very quicky) and general interaction with those that love him. His language has developed at a furious rate - I was away for four days last week and when I came back he was speaking less in a baby voice and using complicated sentences. And it's this language that becomes an endearing part of James. His interpretation of words generates humorous terms that don't last long. I thought it was best to capture some of this on the blog so that I don't forget it (I started writing this six months' ago). I was taking him back home from school and we were talking about the days of the week. The interaction went along these lines
James - Monday, Tuesday, Thursday...
Dad - Wednesday comes after Tuesday JimJam. What comes after Thursday
James - lunchtime
Here is glossary of some of the words that we heard over the last year, sadly most have disappeared and have been substituted with the correct words (if they could ever be correct)
Buckaflow - buffalo (or Gruffalo)
Buckerfly - butterfly
Rhinoris - I think this is clear
Clackadow or clockadow (hard to hear) - crocodile
Tinkerbell - jingle bells
Hail, heyl, hale - the stuff that horses eat
Storn - when the rain comes down and lightening (or struckening as his older brother used to call it) strikes
Burny - chewing gum. I think this has something to do with me slathering a piece of chewing gum with Tabasco hoping he woudn't chew it. He chewed it anyway. We now have a three year old addicted to chewing gum, I mean burny.
Pilgit - this was a once off
Sharing's caring - a term used when he wants to play with something that is dear to his brother who is refusing to hand it over (dankie tog that Barney has disappeared from our TV)
And the best of the lot is "Farmer Christmas"
With language comes expression, with expression comes volume, with volume comes protest. The naughty corner is certainly not going to gather cobwebs in a hurry.
Our house is now a busy house, so many personalities and so much activity. Next year is nursery school and more adventures. You are still the delight that you always were JimJam, from the minute I set my eyes on you I knew you would add a dimension to my life that I would always cherish. Your family adores you, and do so more each day.
Where would we be without music, actually that should be, where would I be without music. James Phillips is James' designated musician. This track was co-written with Carl Raubenheimer and has a certain looseness to it, at times Carl and James sing different words, but then so did John and Paul on Please, Please Me
Jimmy McCulloch first gained fame with Thunderclap Newman, however most people know him as the SG wielding guitarist for McCartney (himself a James) in the 1970s. This song has been buzzing around my head for a while.
Two and everything's "mine". Not only is everything his but everyone else's possessions are also "mine". And for the record, his opinions are also "mine". Not that mine is a bad thing, if you want James to eat his dinner then all you need to do is take his food away and say "mine". He reclaims it very quickly.
Here we are approaching the terrible twos with much vigour – so much vigour in fact that he decided to start a little earlier, like six months' earlier. I'm only writing this now because I'm scared I might forget these strange tantrums, most of which end with him face down on the floor oblivious to who might be ignoring him at that moment. This is all normal and James is a very normal little boy. He's been mobile for the last year and at times can disappear very quickly. His affinity for his scooter makes this departure even faster.
Other than that he is a very affectionate younger brother who is closely watched by his older brother. He loves books and all that silly TV that we used to watch with Oliver that I hoped would disappear. Barney's back but might be playing second fiddle to Noddy and Thomas (the tank engine). Right now Thomas is HUGE!!!!!!!!!! And fortunately for us we have a Thomas book which goes to bed with him every night. The nightly routine involves reading the same(!) books, well not reading more like discussing the pictures. His favourites the RaaRaa book, pig book, bear book, and potty book. This would go on all night if I didn't find some excuse to put him in his cot.
Then there's the language, he's a complete mimic and is incorporating these words into his daily conversation. He knew Mama and Dada a long time ago but wouldn't say his brother's name. One morning whilst on holiday we were woken up by James' "Ahva, Ahva". He now knew his brother's name. We often hear him say "Ahva bath, or Ahva cry". And then there's Thuli and Shona. Shona is very important in his life and has taken a brotherly role which is very appreciated by James.
For me, James is the younger son every father could wish for. He is loving, affectionate, warm and has the most infectious laugh I have ever heard. He is a happy little boy who is loved by everyone around him. The terrible twos are upon us but there's probably more humour in them than anything else. He is a vital part of our lives and I look forward to everyday.
Happy birthday dearest JimJam and for the record you are MINE!!!!
The picture above is his aunt Frances and him reading the Raa Raa book. As I mentioned, still a firm favourite.
James' nominated musician is James Phillips. Did I mention that Mr Phillips babysat James' mother in the 80s? I only ever saw him once on the Voelvry Toer and I didn't know what I was seeing at the time. If you did the see the tour then perhaps you'll remember this.
The very first CD I ever bought (I'd bought vinyl up to that point) was Elmore James' greatest hits. I got into Elmore James via Jeremy Spencer and Fleetwood Mac. Jeremy was and still is a huge god of mine. Elmore is incredible and I recently attempted a performance of this song. My attempt to match Elmore's perfection is still a little lacking.