Paul Janisch

VOTE THIS COMING ELECTION !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! – just not for the ANC

This is not my own original work but you can pretend it came from my pen

________________________________________________________________________________________

If like me, you don't have a passport from another country and you quite like living in South Africa, now is quite an important time for you. Instead of using clichés like "the future is in your hands...." or "make your mark, let your voice be heard!" and other ineffective drivel, I am going to just draw your attention to the following:

• Bob Mugabe had to amend the constitution of Zimbabwe to allow him to remain in power as president, long after he had reached his intellectual sell-by-date. (Before this, as in all "democracies", there was a limit to the number of terms which a president could serve). Having changed it once, he did it again. Then he was on a roll. The rest of the story we all know very well. With hindsight, we can see that had he been prevented from taking the first step, the whole sub-Saharan part of Africa would have been spared quite a lot of bother.
• When Hitler took over Germany he systematically turned it into a fascist police-state, where no-one (no, not even German citizens) had any freedom. He did this by passing one piece of legislature after another. Slowly he started to ban things (like women shaving their legs and underarms). Next he formed a special police force which was under his personal control (the infamous Gestapo) to enforce these new laws. Then he banned some more things, like jokes, clever books and talking about him behind his back. By the time he had mobilised his army, and banned being Jewish or trying to stop him from invading your country it was TOO LATE! He had gained too much momentum.

"How did Hitler and Bob manage this?" you may ask. Baby steps.

Each time they changed something, they convinced all the stupid people that it was for the greater good. Clever people, who could tell that it wasn't, thought to themselves "Surely they won't get away with this" over tea and rusks, but did nothing. By the time someone decided to stand up and make a scene, his house had been burned down and his head was firmly wedged between an S.S. boot and the pavement outside.

Now, I'm sure we all agree that one "Jacob Gedleyihlekisa Zuma" possesses neither the intellect, balls or charisma to start a world war. However, he has somehow managed to wangle his way into a position where he can very well take the first baby step towards making a complete pig's ear of our country. Old-school racist whites are always on about our country going to the dogs and ending up like Zimbabwe…... Of course they did this because they were narrow-minded and ignorant, not because they were keeping a keen eye on actual political developments. Our downfall will not be racism as everyone predicted in 1994, it will be corrupt politicians driven by greed and a hunger for power. And people drinking tea saying "surely they won't get away with that?".

Now, JZ's trial has been scheduled for August (which is AFTER the election). After winning the election, the ANC plans on amending the constitution to prohibit the acting president from being prosecuted in a court of law. Just like with Bob Mugabe, the most fundamental law of the country will now be changed to suit the whims of a criminal with no brain. (Never mind the fact that this would actually mean that he could literally commit murder and get away with it until he steps down as president). Our constitution is literally the anchor which stops our country from drifting down river and over the edge of a waterfall. It leaves ultimate power in the hands of the courts and judges and prevents government from raising itself above the law. To allow anyone to mess with it is equivalent to committing a slow national suicide.

The ANC no doubt thinks they will again get the two thirds majority they need to tinker with the constitution in the April election.

I beg to differ. I hope and believe that, unlike the sheep of the past in Germany and Zimbabwe , the average person who receives this mail has actually had enough of all these shenanigans and would like to see the appearance of justice, logic and efficiency in government. Unfortunately, we are in the minority. However, to prevent things from getting worse really fast, all we have to do (for now) is:

VOTE !!!!!!!!

And then, when the election comes, vote for anyone except the ANC. You can vote for Vernon Koekemoer or Skippy Peanut Butter for all I care, just as long as no one gets a two-thirds majority! I swear on my grandma's grave... if I hear someone (who didn't vote or couldn't vote because they were too lazy or hungover to register) complaining at a braai about the government I will come in from the side with a flying head-butt which will leave you so brain-damaged you'll join the ANC youth league and vote for Julius Malema in 2014.

This country is genuinely amazing, let's not let a small handful of people use it as their personal monopoly set and turn it into another post-Colonial African 3rd World sad story. Vote, dammit! People are willing to die fighting for the right to vote. If you don't, and you end up watching as the country slowly slides into an abyss it will be "on you".

Let's try and go for this result

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Related articles

It wasn't you, it was the wind

This is the face of the ANC

"Others complained to the public protector and she also investigated and she didn’t say that the president misused taxpayers money. She was speaking in English ... she said there was "undue benefit"... I’m still looking for it (the undue benefit) till today ... because the government’s (inter-ministerial report) did say what happened," said Mr Zuma, suggesting that he did not accept Ms Madonsela’s findings.

via www.bdlive.co.za

A conceited, arrogant liar and thief. Be sure to keep this at the back of your mind when you vote.

Weightloss is a form of transformation

Too much BEE has not been known to kill a person yet but it can really raise your bloodpressure to unhealthy levels.  I am starting a new venture in the transformation world but this does not require anyone to measure  blackness.  The only measurement we're interested in is your belt size.  If your clothes feel looser the chances are you'll feel better.

The name of the new company is 5Notches.com, notches of course referring to a notch in your belt.  I do understand that women don't wear belts as often as men but they also know when their clothes are too tight.  Our philosophy is simple - if your  clothes feel looser then you are losing weight.  If you're losing weight then your blood pressure will return to healthy levels, you'll have more energy and you'll be happier in general.

Up until this point there's nothing new here.  Every weightloss/diet/nutrition or eating plan says exactly the same thing.   What makes 5Notches.com different is that we don't think that a long term lifestyle plan has much success if you have to go cold turkey.   It doesn't deal with basic issues of craving.  Every diet etc will require to either eat less or cut out something. We've developed a five step plan to wean you off sugar and carbohydrates.  The fact remains that we are all addicted to some type of food and this addiction is not particularly good for us.  You could regard tobacco as food if Frank Zappa is anything to go by.  

The 5Notches.com method lowers you down gently.  On the way you're going to find that you are slowly gaining control over your addiction, and all the while you'll start losing weight.  Your cholesterol levels will become manageable, you'll be less stressed and probably quite a lot happier.  Also - and this is a VERY IMPORTANT ALSO, you will never go hungry.  Tim Noakes told me that human beings should really only eat every 14 hours.  The reason behind this is that they aren't hungry.  Any diet that keeps you craving your next meal has little chance of success.  Our method is - eat when you are hungry and eat as much as you like, just don't eat any carbohydrates.

I'll be posting more on this over the next few years.  Sorry to those who subscribed to a pure BEE blog, we're still on the subject of transformation - it's just that this type of transformation does not involve Rob Davies (dankie tog).  However whilst Rob Davies is still in charge of destroying our country I'll still find time to deal with those issues.

 

Related articles

Frank Zappa on democracy and artistic freedom

We are here today to bury …………….

In my opinion black economic empowerment as a policy has about three years to live from April 2015. It will survive in certain areas but as far as the general business population is concerned it will be a non-event. Yes there is a great concern about the policy that Rob Davies has published – but in fairness to Rob, every one of his policies are cause for concern. His love of red tape is the stuff of legend. In some cases he is going to seriously hamper any form of economic growth, in other cases like that of BEE it will just fade away – just like the memories of Zuma, Davies and cronies.

So what happens in the next three years? The Wall Street Journal is paying attention to Davies' policies. In a very well written blog post for an international correspondent, Gregory Millman writes

The changes seem to have some wondering whether South African business is worth the trouble of complying. One source familiar with the thinking of U.S. companies in South Africa requested anonymity but emailed, "The new Codes that will be implemented in April 2015 are seen as very difficult to comply with. Ownership will be a mandatory requirement…the new Codes are going to have the effect of firms looking elsewhere to set up office.

As damning as this paragraph is, it's not something that we haven't seen before. I suspect that this is probably closer to the last straw. BEE in itself is not the biggest concern that foreign businesses have; they worry about labour issues, currency volatility, political instability and the Promotion and Protection of Investment Bill. Regarding the latter, EU Trade Commissioner Karl De Gucht said

You have unilaterally put an end to bilateral investment agreements. This is bad policy. You need investment. This is not the way to do it. We, the EU, are the biggest investors in South Africa. Our investment is going down.

Perhaps echoing the sentiment that many US companies express Millman writes of ownership

Some approaches to compliance with B-BBEE can put companies at risk of non-compliance with the U.S. Foreign Corrupt Practices Act. Companies often achieve ownership targets through up front share grants to black partners, with the purchase price paid out of subsequent dividends. "It is almost a government-enforced slush fund," said one Washington D.C. based international trade attorney. "The requirement to cut in black South Africans basically invites companies to find a mechanism to transfer wealth to a select group.

It's clear that foreigners have had enough of Davies and his rules.  Soemone said to me that he needs his head read, it's already red.

What then about those who are going to be left having to comply with BEE once everyone has stopped bothering. Certain companies have contractual obligations to meet a certain BEE level in order to retain licences. Gambling is one- they have to stick to a level 2. Liquor licenses (which fall under the DTI) are the next to do this. But that's not all, the Manufacturing Competitiveness Enhancement Programme (MCEP) requires companies to be a level four contributor or show how they will become so within two years. Those who apply for this will need to consider that the revised BEE codes kick in in April 2015 and a level 4 (under an impossibly onerous scorecard) is now 80 -90 points. Do those who want to apply for grants under this programme know what they are getting themselves in to?

In each of Davies' policies it appears that he thinks that people WANT to go through all these hoops. He uses the word "incentivise" often – but offers no incentives at all, just red tape.

There is an upside. I think that BEE has run its course, I also believe that those connected professional blacks led by Sandile Zungu know this too. They've devised a policy that allows them to milk the system (akin to a licence to loot) for three years. By then they've sown up all the government business and have retired extraordinarily wealthy. They probably also know that political patronage is a fickle game – when your meal ticket has left the building you are thrown out with them. It'll be like the fall of the Berlin Wall, the BEE soldiers will turn a blind eye and companies will stop complying. The trick now is to be the correct lip-service to the policy so that it appears as though you are "committed" to it in the interim.

As to where the poorest of the poor who live because of donations under SED are going to go for money – that needs to be seen. I expect a great deal of hunger and dissatisfaction from these people.

What then are we burying, BEE or South Africa? The answer is very obvious under the Zuma government.

Related articles

BEE and doing business in South Africa (March 2013)

No need to be alarmed yet - but this is a sneak peek of the codes to come

Zuma: BEE fronting unforgivable

Zuma plunges ANC back into darkness

BBC didn't make the cut as a Prasa BEE partner

SABC censorship - who needs them anyway

Unfortunately the overwhelming majority of the population are avid listeners or viewers of the state (read ANC) broadcaster, so if they block a political advertisement then it is up to us to ensure that it is seen.  It is a pity that that person living in Colesburg who Zuma's ANC has methodically shafted over the last five years won't get to see it.  

I like the ad and I despise Zuma - I have to put it on this blog, please send the link to everyone you know.  Those who don't have a smartphone should be shown it.

Related articles

This is the good story SA has to tell, but the SABC might not pick up on it

SABC's non-flighting of the DA ad: Wrong, but not surprising

Quota, un-quota: Mbalula's 'Constitution? What Constitution?' moment

A rather decent explanation of the constitutionality of racial quotas at national level.

Implementing this kind of ruling is also entirely unconstitutional. It can, should and most likely will be challenged in the ConCourt if it is implemented. BEE is not exactly the same as quotas. Players are not "interviewed" as such; the interview process happens at domestic level. This is where quotas of some sort aren’t the worst idea and could be considered in line with the Rooney Rule in America. A forced implementation of such a system at national with the threat of funding cuts and the lot is discrimination which then becomes an employment issue and can be challenged in court.

Furthermore, threats of blocking sponsorship could be considered a restraint of trade. Legally, a system like this, in a modern and democratic South Africa, holds little water. From the outside looking in, it looks like nothing more like subtle pre-election campaigning.

via www.dailymaverick.co.za

One of the comments on the Daily Maverick page is perhaps the funniest I've read in a long time, credited to a JvNk.

Why stop at transforming the teams only? There is a much bigger picture, namely the supporters and spectators. So by all means, force the Lions, Bulls and Boks to have 60% black players, but then transform the supporters too.

Force the turnstiles at Loftus to do pencil tests, and strictly admit 6 blacks for every 4 white spectators. Have DSTV force its clients to identify their racial group, and then force DSTV to switch off whites' rugby channels until there are 6 black viewers for every 4 whites.

I'm willing to wager that some wANCer is looking at this and thinking what a great idea.  From now on................  

• ALL television adverts will take EAP targets into account when seeking actors.
•  Places of worship will not have a quorum unless the congregation matches the national EAP. 
• Your Facebook account will be cancelled unless you have suitable EAP representation - those that don't must send a plan to Mildew Heffalump explaining when their Facebook friends will meet the national targets.  
• The Universe will be regarded as anti-transformation until white holes are discovered and they match the EAP
• The game of chess is not representative of the South African population and is hereby deemed to be anti-transformation.  From now on 28 of the 32 pieces need to be black, 13 of those 28 need to be black female and the remaining four need to be white.  As you can see the white chess men/people have an overwhelming advantage over the black ones so only 6 black pieces may be taken per game

The new Commission or Employment Equity report is out - these are the latest figures.  They are correct - the actual figures on page 13 don't total 100.

 

	Male	Female	TOTAL
African	40.3%	34.9%	75.2%
Coloured	5.6%	5.0%	10.6%
Indian	1.9%	1.2%	3.1%
White	6.2%	4.6%	10.8%
TOTAL	54.0%	45.7%	99.7%

 

Related articles

Mbalula ignorant about sport: FF Plus

Quota, un-quota: Mbalula's 'Constitution? What Constitution?' moment

Red card for Mbalula

Codes that do not meet quota 'will be banned from international events'

Opposition to sports quotas grows

Black is black – I want my black back

What does a ruling party do when they realise that their definition of black is not working for them? Simple, they use the economically active population (EAP) to create degrees of blackness. Perhaps the gestation of this thinking went along these lines.

ANC/government person 1: Soooooooooooooo we've got the definition of black in the BEE Act and the Amended Employment Equity Act as a "generic term for Africans, Coloured and Indians (subject to a few conditions.)

ANC/government person 2 (who has more than a standard 3/grade 5 and can read legislation): Indeed we do.

ANC/government person 1: This is not working for us.

ANC/government person 2 (who has more than a standard 3/grade 5 and can read legislation): Why is that?

ANC/government person 1: The bloody Coloureds and Indians are taking all the jobs and business and skills development spend and enterprise development and socio-economic development opportunities from the Africans. Our people (because the ANC is really an African party) are suffering.

ANC/government person 2 (who has more than a standard 3/grade 5 and can read legislation): Let's take a lead from the great leaper of vines – jungle jim (Mr Manyi as Hendrik Verwoerd would address him) and use the EAP. This way we get to prioritise jobs and other benefits for Africans.

ANC/government person 2 (who also has more than a standard 3/grade 5 and hence has no hope of running the country and cares not a fig for the Constitution): What a spiffing idea, I'll tell Mildred and you tell Rob.

On the way to see Rob, ANC/government person 1 bumps into Fikile Mbalula……..

The casual reader might think that this author has a major problem with this logic. Actually he doesn't (if I may speak for him). There is little doubt that Africans (who aren't white by the way even though it's patently obvious that white South Africans are Africans) are not benefiting as greatly as perhaps Coloureds and Indians are. But there are two problems

1. There is no legislation that allows the government to separate black people into further racial qualifications.

   The word black under both the EE and BEE Acts remains a generic term for "Africans, Coloureds and Indians".

2. It pisses off Coloureds and Indians

The second point is the most relevant because there is now a genuine outcry from Coloureds in the Western Cape who make up more than 40% of the EAP in that area and Indians in KZN. Regarding the latter there is a complete over-concentration of Indians in that region.

In the province of KwaZulu-Natal, where the majority of South Africa's 1.4 million Indian-origin citizens live, business and community leaders say such a law would reduce the number of jobs available to Indians because the national demographic population figure would be overwhelmingly black. Indians were shipped to KwaZulu-Natal from 1860 onwards to work as indentured laborers at sugar cane plantations, according to Ravi Pillay, an ANC member and provincial minister for Human Settlements and Public Works in KwaZulu-Natal.

Even Vivian Reddy who is a great Zuma acolyte is also not in favour of this.

An Indian businessman based in KwaZulu-Natal, Vivian Reddy said Indians were unfairly and unjustly being prejudiced by the proposed law.

That's a turnaround for the books.

The draft EE Codes of Good Practice have been roundly lambasted by a wide variety of people – including Marius Fransman. The period for comments has now past and Mildew Pachyderm has issued a press release

The draft Employment Equity (EE) regulations issued by the Department of Labour are in no way intended to disadvantage any of the designated groups, according to the Minister of Labour, Mrs Mildred Oliphant.

"Contrary to what some parties have claimed, the regulations were in fact introduced to enhance the implementation of the law. We opened the process up for comments and we sincerely appreciate and welcome all the comments that have been made. The social partners at the National Economic Development and Labour Council (Nedlac) are now busy consolidating these inputs. This means the final product will be a result of a consultative process that reflects the views of a cross-section of our population," she said.

These two paragraphs deserve a little more attention. The "in no way intended to disadvantage" disclaimer doesn't work anymore. We've learned the hard way from number 1's insincerities that they don't care about the consequences of their legislation. What she really means here is that the regulations are designed (not specifically unfairly as I mentioned earlier) to benefit Africans. They don't INTEND to disadvantage Coloureds and Indians even though they do in fact disadvantage them. We can take that with a pinch of salt.

And then the kicker – by now your bullshit radar must be on high alert – the social partners are consolidating the inputs. Let us consider Rob and his divisive codes – there is no way that the dti or Rob considered any of business' comments. They went ahead and published what they wanted to publish all in the name of section 9(2) of the Constitution. Rather like die-hard Nats justified apartheid.

AND

There is NO WAY ON god's GREEN EARTH that we can trust the ANC government's word here. The chances are overwhelming that they will go ahead and publish these codes as drafted and hide again behind section 9(2) and say – we never intended to prejudice. Yes, like Hitler never intended to kill Jews and Poles, all he wanted was a third Reich without them in it.

What then happened to ANC/government person 1 bumping into Fikile Mbalula (who is regarded by Gareth van Onselen as "the worst sports minister South Africa has ever had") and tells him about this new EAP thing that's taking the ANC by storm. Fikile yells "Europia" – we're going to set 60% quota targets on the major sporting codes (perhaps all of them). The press haven't really got the proper story here – in a long interview with Xolani Gwala on 702 last night he explained that the quotas are not generic black, nein mein Herr, these are African quotas.

As you can see, the EAP is a firm ANC policy. Whilst not specifically unreasonable (although I don't agree with national teams being bound to quotas) they do not have Constitutional or legislative support. In the absence of this the government cannot arbitrarly impose their will on us.

And this is one of the core tenets of our court case against the dti and their new codes.

Black is black anybody

 

Related articles

Who is an African?

Manyi crEAP and the new codes

Call to exclude Indians from BEE

DA: Equity rules racist

Verwoerd style population control back in SA

Zulu group accuses South African Indians of racism

Anti-Indian group criticised

This is the good story SA has to tell, but the SABC might not pick up on it

The Youtube link died and we can't have this video being forgotten.  

It's going to go viral so I thought I'd help it along.  The SABC is definitely not going to play it so it is our responsibility to show it to those avid SABC watchers 

NKANDLA STYLE VIDEO from zumastyle on Vimeo.

 Then I was wondering whether we could substitute the word Nkandla with the word fuck.  I suppose you could say South Africa was fairly Nkandlad by Zuma, or Zuma is Nkandlaring South Africa.  It even works to describe how Zuma has told us to  Nkandloff.  Nkandla is also synonymous with ignorance - Nkandlangazi.  If you feel that you have been shafted then you might say - I was completely Nkandlad in that deal.

And then there is Nkandlarisation.  Which is the process of fucking over an entire country and ensuring that your best mates run to your defence uber alles.  Something that we used to call a lager mentality.   

Nkandlagate doesn't really work.  It was a lot more than a gate that he stole from us, we need some sort of compound word.  Nkandlavatoryfirepoolfencekraalandlifttwentywivesbutnoshower.................?

 

 

Related articles

Nkandla: Where's the shame?

Is this now a criminal offence? - Constitutionally Speaking